Shall I throw a temper tantrum? It seems a fitting place to do just that because, you see, I don’t want to chronicle the story God has told me to write this morning. Nonetheless, here goes.
One day of our short mission trip to Mt. Vernon, Kentucky, I was feeling left out because the major part of the day’s work was on the roof and I didn’t want to don the required safety harness and tether which appeared to be too restrictive.
In the early part of the day there was little I could do. One of the other lady missioners offered to let me “help” her but it was obvious to me this was the kind of help a mother allows her little child to do – she could do it easier herself and it was just meant to placate the child (me!).
I’ll admit I was in a bit of a funk that morning, and I said, “I feel like a kindergartner.” Well, I did, but it would have been far better to have kept those words bottled up, because all I accomplished was hurting the one who graciously offered opportunity to be an active member of the team.
She was hurt emotionally. I felt awful for having done that to her, and the result was a distance between us that hadn’t been there before.
Later, I was able to apologize and attempt to restore our relationship. She very graciously accepted my apology, but I felt our relationship was on shaky ground after that.
Have you ever been in that situation? Where you knew you were in the wrong and wanted to have a do-over so no one was hurt?
That thoughtless remark in response to her graciousness was needless and hurtful. Though we will remain friends, and hopefully do another mission trip together, that is not the best way to develop friendship. I do appreciate her for her loving, giving, and forgiving Christian life. She is a far better testimony to Jesus’ love than I am.
Now you see why I didn’t want to write this story. It’s like hanging out my dirty laundry for all the world to see because my actions and words that day were SIN just as surely as though I had robbed a bank or committed some other grievous crime.
But Jesus died on the cross to pay for my sin – just as He also paid the debt for your sin. It’s still wrong, but when I confess and ask for forgiveness, He washes me clean as He promised.
“‘Come now, let’s settle this,” says the Lord. “Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool.”’ (Isaiah 1:18, New Living Translation)